A day in the life of a conservative American.......
or, 50 ways to love your liberal heritage

Joe flipped on the lights in the pre-dawn dark.  He wouldn't have any lights(1), of course, if it wasn't for the TVA(2) that supplied electricity to his home which was wired many years ago (3)as a result of bringing electricity and telephones to rural America(4).  

He put coffee into the filter(5), poured water into the coffee maker (6) slipped some bacon into a frying pan(7), turned on the gas(8), and got a couple of eggs from the fridge(9).  While he was waiting for the coffee he decided to catch the morning radio show (10) then went to the bathroom where he did what most people do in the morning(11).   

1.  Regulations govern the voltage and frequency of the electricity, the safety of the delivery system and the appliances, the rates that can be charged, the recourses available as a citizen if the utility doesn't perform properly.  Four items and the guy's feet haven't even hit the floor!
2.  The TVA also made the Tennessee River navigable, besides supplying electricity. Two.
3.  Building codes make sure that the electrical wiring is correctly engineered and installed. 
4.  Beats oil lamps and tin cans on strings.  Thank you, FDR.  Two.
5.  The coffee made it to Joe's table because of international trade laws, fair weights and measures, and federal trucking regulations.  Three.
6.  The water was safe to drink because of state and federal regulations.
7.  Joe paid for a pound of bacon and got a pound, not less.  It was safe to eat, he would not get ill from it. Two.
8.  The gas was delivered safely and economically via a complex system of hardware and regulations. Two.
9.  The eggs were likewise of known quality and size.  Two. 
10.  The radio show came in without interference from other stations because of federal regulations allocating the frequencies available.  

Joe hasn't even gotten to the bathroom and his life has been positively influenced 
by at least 20 areas of progressive policy and government regulations!

11.  See #3.  

Joe plods back to the kitchen, fishes in the cabinet, and pulls out a few pill bottles.  He takes his vitamins and his prescription drugs for high blood pressure (12).   As a matter of curiosity, he looks on the tub of margarine to see how much sodium is in the spread (13).  He sighs and decides to scramble his eggs today.  

After he takes his shower, he selects his clothes (14), gets dressed, picks up his keys and other routine items, and heads out to his car.  After starting the engine (15) Joe backs out of the driveway and heads to The Big City (16)  While he is driving, he enjoys the smooth road and gently rolling hills with its forests and meadows (17)(18).

12.  No doubt the pharmaceutical company that created the drug used large amounts of "pure" scientific research that was funded by the government through universities, research often considered worthless as it has no immediate practical application.   The effectiveness and purity of the drug was assured by the Food and Drug Administration.  Two.
13.  The FDA likewise mandates all food to be labeled so that Joe can make informed decisions and avoid foods harmful to his health.
14.  Unfortunately, the government could not prevent Joe from making horrible fashion mistakes.  However, mandatory information on tags of his shirts and pants told him that he could not just throw those wool pants into the washing machine.  So he takes them to the local dry cleaner, whose use of carcinogenic "perc" is highly regulated so that it doesn't get into the air and water. (Even though a lot has prior to environmental awareness.) Two.
15.  Joe's engine started because the quality of the gasoline is tightly regulated.  It is also lead free thanks to the necessity of pollution control's strict diet.  He also paid for ten gallons yesterday and he got ten gallons. Two.
15.  No cars were driving on the left side of the road that morning, his headlights were at a proper height and aim, and he knew that he should stop at stop signs and follow the rules of the road. All of this "non-event" is due to enforced state motor vehicle laws. A BIG one.
17. Joe's gasoline purchase included taxes to build and repair the safe roads that he used. 
18. What Joe did not know is the bucolic scenery he enjoyed every day was once stripped of all trees, overgrazed, and caused a major flood.  The CCC built flood control dams, planted trees and grasses, and other agencies bought the land which never should have been farmed in the first place. (Based on a true story from Elbert County, Colorado.)

At the office, Joe got on the elevator and was whisked to the thirtieth floor (19).  He stopped by the mailroom and found his paycheck direct deposit receipt.  Opening the envelope, he sighed again when he saw the mandatory deductions: Federal and State taxes, Social Security contribution, and Medicare.  He walked to his desk, and as he did every day because he was A Good Son, called Mom.

"Hi, Mom."
"All is well.  Well, almost.  I just get so tired of all of these taxes.  Why, I don't work for myself, I work for the government!" (As you will see, he was more correct than he thought.)
"Did the doctor (20) figure out what was wrong? ...... Good.  Will Medicare (21) cover all of it, or do you need some money?"  (I told you, he is A Good Son!)
"Yeah, I know, Dad's (22) pension (23) didn't leave you much, but with Social Security (24) and what Bud and I are willing to chip in, you'll always have money for bingo, mom!"  They both laughed.

19.  Elevators are inherently unsafe, yet they are safe due to oversight and regulations.
20.  The doctor, the nurses, and all of the medical professionals had to meet strict educational and practical standards.  Joe's mother could reasonably expect, and got, quality medical care because of those regulations.
21.  Medicare!  It was only a generation ago that many seniors weighed whether to eat or see a doctor.  Fought by the AMA as "socialized medicine", the medical community discovered this was a whole new income stream!  Don't all Americans deserve as much?  Oh yes, administrative costs are about 9% of the total cost.  Private plans run about 25%.  Government inefficiency?
22.  Dad was a public school teacher, a tax supported vocation.  Joe benefited from this.
23.  Dad's pension was strictly controlled as to the investments, oversight, and then making sure that payments to his widow are made reliably. 
24.  Social Security!  The other biggie.  While SS has its problems and is barely adequate for many, it is the foundation that prevents many seniors from begging on the streets.  Or living with the kids!

Joe has been up for a just a few hours and hasn't even started his work day (Mom wanted to talk awhile.) In this short time frame, Joe did not have to worry about many matters of health and finance.  He just took the lack of need to attend to these matters as a given. And, indeed, they were given to Americans by Progressive laws and regulations.

Thirty seven easy to identify ways Joe's life was made good by these laws!

During the course of the day, Joe's life was helped in many more ways that his bias prevented him from seeing:

25. When he went on line to check his investment portfolio, he could make investment decisions because he could trust the information he got, thanks to the SEC. (Note: this has been increasingly difficult since 2000 due to emasculation of the regulatory process by Joe's own party!)
26.  When he called his travel agent for a flight to The Bigger City, he reasonably expected that he would arrive there safely, thanks to the FAA's enormous roll in making this happen.
27.  He didn't even know or appreciate the immense roll of the Weather Service and the GPS satellites in his travels. Two.
28.  Joe could read. (Obviously his public school experience was some time ago!)
29.  Joe had attended an excellent state university, one of the many that are the envy of millions around the world.  Joe's education was heavily subsidized by taxes, and he was able to get federal loans at low interest rates to help further.  Two.
30.  When Joe lost his previous job, he qualified for Unemployment Insurance for six months.  Although times were tough, he was able to keep his house.  He also found his current job with the help of the state job agency. Two.
31.  While Joe was on line, he checked his bank account.  It was safe and secure, thanks to banking laws.
32.  The air Joe was breathing while he was in The Bigger City was better than it was thirty years ago despite more people and cars. Thank you, EPA!
33.  Joe worked for a software developer, who in turn, got business from government agencies and other businesses.  One of those businesses had large contracts to built radar systems for the US Air Force.  So, a lot of his company's income depended on government tax monies! Two.

And for a bonus 51st example:
34.  Of course, Mom's bingo parlor was under the watchful eye of the state!

Gee, it's not even lunch time yet!

Let's see, the food Joe eats at his favorite restaurant is safe due to health regulations....
and on...
and on...
it goes!

And let's not forget the greatest liberal experiment
ever created.....

Republican Democracy, a.k.a.

The United States of America!

lib'-er-al, adj. of or befitting a man of free birth; not bound by orthodoxy, authoritarianism, or traditional forms; associated with ideals of economic freedom, greater individual participation in government, and constitutional, political, and administrative reforms designed to secure these objectives.  a political philosophy based on belief in progress, the essential goodness of man, and the autonomy of the individual and standing for the protection of political and civil liberties.  (Selected definitions from Webster's Collegiate Dictionary.)